Pownce on David Leo on Pownce“What’s up you losers! We’re Rotten Black Soul all the way from Vajina, Illinois! We’re on our two-week tour through the towns of everyone on our MySpace friends list who are letting us crash on their couches! That’s Jeff on lead guitar, Colin on rhythm guitar, Fred on bass, Scooter on drums, and my name is MALAMAR!! This song is about burning in acid. It’s called: ‘BURNING!! IN!! ACID!!!!!’” (more…)
1. Dry humping random strangers is not a good way to meet people.
2. Dry humping musical instruments on stage is not sexy. (more…)
Blah blah blah. Busy busy busy. No time for chilling… or sleeping… or, well, life.
No change; constant consistency. Head spinning. Who’s gonna catch my head when it flies off? (more…)
The microphone is a chew toy. Singing, screaming, growling, moaning… the only ways for a guy to deep-throat a phallic object without (more…)
School, work, music, sleep, school, work, music, sleep, sleep, sleep, lather, rinse, repeat… Do the dishes, do laundry, do work for school, do the dew, do unto others, do what thou wilt… Talk to myself, talk to you, talk to no one, talk out of my ass, talk with my foot in my mouth…
I had way more caffeine today (more…)
More ways to get your band’s stage show to not suck!
8. Don’t EVER while you’re on stage advertise (more…)
Haha! You thought you were done realizing how much you suck! Hold onto your teddy bears, here’s Part 2 of the No One and a Half Two Cents on Stage Shows for Musicians… in list form! (more…)
Your band’s stage show is pathetic. Only you can figure out how to improve it, but I’d like to give you one man’s opinion on what you’re doing wrong. Unfortunately, that one man happens to be me. So, with the help of my good friends Sleep Deprivation and Caffeine Withdrawal, I present to you, in list form, part 1 of the No One and a Half Two Cents on Stage Shows for Musicians! (more…)
Check it: You’re mind-blowingly metal. Metal is your middle name and might as well be your first and last as well. You bleed metal. No, seriously, molten steel actually comes out when you bleed. (more…)
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